Chapter 1: The origin — the beginning of endless suffering
It began with a thought. Just one. A whisper buried in the static of his mind, soft enough to ignore, yet sharp enough to leave a scar. Why are you like this? Eru lay still on his bed, unmoving, his eyes open but unfocused. The ceiling hovered above him like a weight, closer than it used to be. The curtains had not been drawn in days, and the light had long since vanished from the room. Maybe the sun still rose. Maybe it didn’t. He didn’t know anymore. He didn’t sleep. Not because his body wasn’t exhausted, but because every time he closed his eyes, the silence would shatter. Thoughts screamed at him in a language made of regrets. At first, he called it overthinking. He told himself it was common, that everyone gets stuck in loops now and then. But his weren’t loops. They were traps. Thoughts spun like blades, slicing through every memory, every spoken word, every decision he could no longer change. They spun tighter and faster, until even breathing felt like a question without an answ...